Event & Wedding Guest Etiquette

Colorado weddings with A Memory Lane Event Jennifer Lane

When your friends or family invite you to a party or invite you to come to their wedding, you know that there are all kinds of etiquette rules that govern their behavior. But did you know there are rules for event & wedding guests too? To ensure that you don't inadvertently commit a faux pas or do anything mistaken at a loved one's event or wedding, follow these simple rules. 

Don't be late! If an invitation says that the festivities will begin at 5, be sure to arrive there by 4:45 so as to give yourself time to find a seat and get settled, especially if the special occasion is a wedding. You wouldn't want to interrupt the processional.

If it is a wedding AVOID taking photographs during the ceremony. Leave that to the professionals and respect the sanctity of the ritual in front of you.

You don't need to bring a gift with you to the wedding. In fact, you have up until a year after the wedding to give a gift.  If you are unable to attend the wedding, it is customary to still send a wedding gift.

Don't bring a date unless your invitation specifically says their name or "+ Guest".  Remember that the cost for each person attending an event or wedding is generally high, so bringing unexpected guests is very impolite. This includes your children or other relatives!



Colorado weddings by A Memory Lane Event

Many ceremonies have parts where the congregation alternately stands and sits. The program or officiant may tell you when to do so; if not, follow the lead of others around you. If you are physically unable to stand, remain quietly seated.

RSVP promptly. The couple will be making many decisions based on the number of people who will be there. Additionally, if you must cancel after you have accepted, do so as soon as possible.

While a wedding is a time to enjoy yourself, no one appreciates a drunk guest embarrassing themselves. Drink alcohol in moderation.

Above all, enjoy yourself, and tell the happy couple that you are so pleased for them.

Receiving Line....To Have or Not to Have?



Colorado weddings by A Memory Lane Event

A receiving line of old, usually happened after the ceremony but before the reception. Bride, Groom and wedding party would make a line and all the guests would go down the line to congratulate the bride, groom and bridal party. Some brides and grooms would worry about the line taking up too much time.

If you have a receiving line after the ceremony, check with your officiant, there could be restrictions where the line could form. Many of today's weddings opt not to have a receiving line but to use the time during the cocktail hour or after dinner to walk around and great family and guests. Since the bride and groom are the first to receive dinner, they are the first finished. Going around the room to each table is more informal and relaxed way to talk with guests. Take your photographer with you to capture each table with you and the groom. (Guests have more to say when there is not a line of people waiting behind them.)

Religion, Tradition, and the wedding Guest

If you’re worried about attending a ceremony in a different religion or culture than your own, don’t worry. You will most likely not being the only “outsider” there, and the primary thing the bride and broom will care about is your presence. These days, a religious wedding ceremony is generally open for those of other faiths to attend, and you can participate in as much or as little as you choose. Religious leaders are accustomed to the fact that there will be people of many faiths attending; thus they generally tend to explain what is happening, and what the congregation is expected to do. If you’re worried that your own religion won’t approve of you attending another worship service, speak with your religious leader. In the event it’s not appropriate for you, you can probably skip the ceremony and attend only the reception.

Here’s a quick rundown of things guests might encounter at a religious wedding:

Catholic: Most weddings include communion, which is offered only to those who have received their First Holy Communion in the Catholic Church. If you aren’t Catholic, stand so that any Catholics in your row may pass, then sit back down and wait quietly.

Jewish:The wedding service is often in Hebrew, but if you don’t understand the language, try to enjoy the spirit, music, and company around you. Men, no matter what their faith, are generally expected to wear skull caps or yarmulkes inside the synagogue. You’ll most likely find them being given out just outside of the doors.

Colorado weddings with A Memory Lane Event - Chuppa

Muslim:Most Muslims do not have a public ceremony, only a public reception.

Mormon: Most Mormon wedding ceremonies are restricted to only practicing Mormons. Don’t be offended if you aren’t invited to the ceremony.

To add to your comfort level, why not ask the bride and groom to give you a brief outline of what to expect on the day of the wedding. Or, you can read these links for general overviews.